Category Archives: Design your future

How to fix your life when you’ve hit rock bottom

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If you’re in a space with your life right now where you are feeling lost, or confused, or completely stuck, this article will help you figure out how to fix your life when you’ve hit rock bottom. It might happen once or multiple times. Most people experience one or more hit rock bottom moments over the course of their life. Free yourself with a few simple steps.

 

How to fix your life when you’ve hit rock bottom

The good news about hitting rock bottom is the only place to go is up. Especially the more rock bottom you are. Think of it this way, if you have financial issues and you file for bankruptcy there’s no worse situation you can achieve. So consider you’re in a life bankruptcy stage. There’s likely far more opportunities for you to go up right now than down at this stage of your life. Simply shifting your thinking to this realization might make you feel a tad better.

Also, consider that the more loss you suffer, the more pain you go through, the more you get to a place of nothing where you can create newly want you want for your life. The more crap you go through, the more beaten down you get by circumstances, the more mentally resilient and open you become to new opportunities.

When you’ve got nothing to lose you can create everything. The world opens up for you. This is because your mental state goes from being super rational and calculated and you just get in action. It’s a bit of a throw shit at the wall to see what sticks mentality you pick up. It’s why many of the visionaries of the world have suffered major trauma and adversity. This time in your life is a badge of honor. A new world and a better you is trying to emerge.

1. Discover, explore, decide and commit

This is the time in your life to mentally “regroup” and do some deep thinking work. It’s time to ask yourself:

What do you really, deeply want your life to be about? What do you want to achieve? What do you want to experience? From there build out what you need to do now to start taking the steps to get there.

If you have no clue or some clue of what you want start getting curious. Get googling. Research what you want. This is the perfect time to take stock. Shift your focus from what you want to change now to getting into a head space of daydreaming and imagining. When you relinquish your control of how you’d like things to go and get into a space of simply, thinking, imagining, daydreaming, that’s when inspiration and ideas about what to do next will start to formulate. Instinctively, you’ll start to know what to do.

This might sound like airy fairy advice but it’s not. Amazing things happen when you let your mind wander. It’s scientifically proven that creative connections happens when you’re not focusing on anything. Your brain goes into a mode of thinking called your Default Mode Network. This is when inspiration will strike you. Clarity will come.

When you’re inner voice or your gut or the Universe (whatever you prefer to call the pangs of intuition we all experience) strike that’s when it’s time to listen and notice. Start to start to see how you can start to take you dreams, the ideas you have for what you want in life and make them happen in reality. What are some small and simple first steps you could take to move forward.

That’s when it’s time to decide on at least one action. Then commit to taking it by scheduling the action or telling one or more people what you’re going to do. Doing this helps you create an accountability structure. It helps you take your ideas from concept to reality.

2. Build out a tangible (and basic) strategy

When you want something that you don’t have it helps to have a plan how to achieve it. Having a paln sketched out will give you a guide, direction and clarity. It will also make you feel good or excited. Because now you’ve figured out what you want and some starters actions to take to get there.

If you don’t know how to get what you want find someone you can model. Learn from people who have been there before. It’s the simplest and fastest way to figure out what to do to get what you want. What are some resources you can tap into right away?

Building an action plan is critical. A lot of people keep their ideas in their head. Capturing your ideas is important because it’s easy to lost them. When you lose direction you can always come back to a plan that’s written down.

A simple way to decide what to do is to draw a horizontal line on a piece of paper. At the end of the line write down an outcome you want to achieve. At the front of the line write down your starting point, where you are now in life. Then plot in any actions that come to mind that you can take immediately and in the near future to start progressing.

3. Take action

Once you have a vague or clear idea of the actions to take all there is for you to do is take them. Setup support structures. Schedule time frames to complete your actions. Tell people what you’re going to do. They will keep you accountable because they’ll ask you if you’ve done what you said.

Learn how to overcome fear and master your habits. These are the two major biological barriers that will get in your way of taking action. You’re physical urges are often more powerful than you’re rational mind. Train your mind to be the master.

4. Evaluate and tweak

Once you start taking action you’ll start to produce new results! Yippee! Whether the results you produce move you forward or set you back it’s good. Use the information you receive from taking action as a feedback mechanism. If what you do moves you closer to what you want then do more. If it moves you away then do less.

No matter what you do, the best advice is to: Use your adversity to your advantage. The shit you go through makes you stronger. If you use, learn from, and use personal power you gain from going through tough times you’ll be able to achieve greater success.

Having fun. Why increasing your fun will lead to a better life

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Take a moment right now to think about the current level of fun you’re having in your life. Seriously, take a second to rate how much fun you’re having on scale of 1 to 10. What number did you give yourself? Need to up your fun level? Read on to learn the critical importance of having fun and why increasing your fun will lead to a better life.

Wh having fun is good for you

Having fun. Why increasing your fun will lead to a better life

Are you having too much fun, too little or,  just enough? It’s important to strike a balance. Too much fun and you won’t be productive; too little fun and your life may lack fulfillment.

And let’s clarify “fun” for the purposes of this article. True fun activities are ones that are frivolously joyful. They have no agenda. And, they are things you do for the sake of doing them. Plus, they don’t produce any other outcome but to make you laugh or smile.

Fun is not a priority for many people

Most people don’t make fun a priority, though having fun is CRUCIAL. Most people put responsibility and their survival needs first. Technically though, isn’t fun a survival need? Ever thought of it this way? Think about it, if you’re always doing what you have to do (and not necessarily want to do) you’ll suck your levels of joy and happiness dry. You’ll mentally drain yourself. The joy you experience from living your life will dwindle.

Is a life worth living if it doesn’t inspire you? Really. Take a moment to consider that question. Isn’t the entire point of life to be happy. To enjoy what you’re up to? To feel fulfilled?

Why fun is critical to happiness

Research backs up these claims. Here’s why increasing your fun will lead to a better life…

Having fun amplifies your joy and fulfillment levels

This is probably a pretty obvious result that comes from having fun.  And it’s an important one. If you ask most people what they want most in life the response is commonly: “To be happy”.  That’s the entire reason for living. Having fun raises your happy factor. It has you produce more positive emotions, the ones linked to your pleasure centers of the brain.

When you engage in fun activities that get you in a state of feeling good, your brain learns to activate the pathways that produce positive emotions faster. The more you have fun the easier it is for you to live in the positive emotional states we all crave.

Having fun increases your productivity

When you have fun you create more energy. You physically rev up your body. Most people don’t understand that, “the more energy you make the more you have”. Think about it. Simply jumping up and down for a few minutes has you feel more full of energy. So, when you have fun you can actually create more physical energy, rather than drain it (which is what activities that are not fun do tend to do).

When you have fun, your brain goes into a relaxed state called your Default Mode Network. During this state your brain makes critical connections. Creativity happens when you allow your mind to lock into it’s DMN mode versus its – neuroscience term here – Task Mode Network. This is what state it’s in when you use your rational thinking brain regions to do activities that are necessary, but aren’t exactly “fun”.

Having fun has you create miraculous things in life and business

Because you allow your brain to go into creative states when you’re having fun, naturally you bring that innovation into your life. You start to see things you haven’t before. New pathways of action become obvious. Your ability to generate ideas is more of an asset in a today’s information-packed world than it ever has been before.

Having fun builds human connection and gives you a social edge

Many fun activities will cause you to interact with other people. Being open to new people, new communities will also help you foster great friends or business relationships.

Ask yourself this question: Is it more enjoyable to be around people who you consider fun, interesting and maybe a bit quirky, or people who are all serious all the time. Being fun gives you a social edge. You bring interesting ideas to the table. If you have more fun, and become more fun by nature, people will want to be around you.

Having fun gives you existential meaning

Fun seems purposeless, but it is in having fun that you connect to yourself in deep ways. Playing connects you to life. It connects you to yourself. It’s in moments of fun where you start to see an new level of life unfold.

Real fun versus fun fallacies 

Most people don’t really know how to have fun. You’ve been conditioned by living in a world where external gratification and fast fixes are a priority. There’s a difference between fun activities that cause you to smile and be giddy just thinking about them versus fun activities that drain your energy. Some activities in your current “fun list” might even wreak havoc and get in the way of what you truly want in life.

There are also activities are fun in moderation. For instance, cooking and eating a beautiful meal with a partner is a fun activity. Food is fun in this way. However, craving and devouring large portions of food without appreciating it makes food no longer fun.

The same goes with alcohol. It’s fun to share a glass or two of wine in a social setting with friends. But there’s a fun fallacy that comes with alcohol. For instance, consuming large amounts is fun at the time, but it drains your energy and messes with your mood. Fun that has a delayed negative payoff isn’t real fun.

Real fun activities are things you do for no reason at all. Painting a picture. Kayaking out on a lake. Playing tennis. Shopping for a new outfit. Playing an instrument. Sing! Come up with a roller derby name for yourself! Learn something totally new that’s something you’ve always want to explore.

How to have more fun

Let your freak flag fly

Be silly. Really silly. Be totally weird in the comfort of your home. With yourself and with anyone you live with. Shake your booty. Start the day with dancing. You can be fun anytime. You can bring fun anywhere you go. A simple way to connect to your fun side is to think of a fun time you had. Close your eyes and bring yourself back to that moment. It will put you in an immediate mental state of fun.

Do things without a reason

When you think “this is a useless thing to do”, it’s probably fun and very useful. Having that thought is a signal that you should go explore that pointless hobby or activity. You may find that pointless activities are the most valuable uses of your time. I dare you to try it.

Connect to your kid-self for inspiration

What were you obsessed with when you were a kid? Did you love to sing? Dance? Read? Or were you one of those kids that was always on the go, running around expending energy and playing sports? Think about what you loved and start there. Go do an activity that is in line with something you used to love doing, but don’t do anymore.

Spend time around or interacting with kids or animals

This is sure to unleash your fun side. Kids and animals are often a direct line to getting into a mood of play and fun. It’s natural to them because they haven’t developed or don’t have the rational brain regions that adults have. (In other words, they don’t have a boring switch)

What can you do that is fun today? What activity can you plan that is fun to do next week. Inject some frivolous fun into your life right away and see for yourself the difference it makes. Your world might just get a bit more colorful.

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Feeling lost in your 20s? You can free yourself quickly

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Feeling lost in your 20s? You can free yourself quickly and maybe quicker than you think. The tips below may inspire you to take some new actions so you can get yourself to a place of feeling better fast.

Feeling lost in your 20s

Feeling lost in your 20s is kind of normal

Feeling lost in your 20s is (unfortunately) part of the process

If you’re feeling lost you might be feeling embarrassed about it, or like you’re being ridiculous. Aren’t the 20s supposed to be some of the best years of your life? You’ve got a bright future ahead of you. You’ve got your youth. And most 20-year olds are also in great physical health. You should be feeling grateful and excited not feeling lost. Right? 

The answer to that is: NO! Feeling lost in your 20s is part of the process. You’re still figuring your life out. Most 20-year olds don’t have it all together. Most have bouts of uncertainty about their direction in life. Take a moment to tell yourself to breathe and chill out. It’s okay to be feeling lost in your 20s. It’s also not that hard to find yourself again.

Here’s why you are feeling lost in your 20s…

Statistically, the occurrence of feeling lost in your 20s is growing rapidly. This is due to a variety of factors but the biggest reason is the Internet. It has changed the way people live and work globally. It’s opened up so many pathways of opportunity. If you’re in you’re 20s your bound to be confused and more than previous generations were.

You’d think having more options would be a good think. You’d think it would give you freedom but that’s not true. Options complicate things. Too much information coming at you warps your energy. It makes you confused. This is why feeling lost in your 20s is a growing experience. There’s a name for it: The Quarter Life Crisis. And you can experience a quarter life crisis anywhere form 20-40 and multiple times!

Feeling lost in your 20s can feel isolating because you think you shouldn’t feel that way. Most people don’t share openly about feeling lost which is why it’s not often talked about. But feeling lost is 100% normal. So take that too heart. It might help to remember that you’re not alone.

How to free yourself when you’re feeling lost in your 20s….

Accept the process

The first thing to do when you’re feeling lost in your 20s is to accept that feeling lost happens. It’s happening to you now. It will likely happen again. Periods of feeling lost is a human experience. Life is not perfect. There are ebbs and flow to the journey. When you’re lost, simply consider that you’re in an ebb period and you’re on your way to clarity. It will come. This time will pass. The way you feel will pass. It’s inevitable.

After you normalize what you’re going through by owning that this is part of the process for everyone then you can take some actions to feel better as soon as possible, gain clarity and jump back into action.

Ask yourself these questions…

It might be time for you to ask yourself some deeper questions about your role in this world and what you want to do with your life. When you answer these questions it will help you formulate future you’d like to see yourself achieve. When you decide what you want and you begin taking action you’ll feel much better. The questions to ask yourself when you’re feeling lost in your 20s are:

1) What do you want your life to be about?

2) What you want to contribute to this world?

3) What do you want to experience in life?  

These are the questions to start to consider. You may have some answers. Or you may not. It doesn’t matter whether you have answers or not. What matters is that you start to think and get curious about these things. Start exploring and researching options conceptually. Start visualizing your future and thinking about what you’d like it to contain.

What do you love to do now? 

What are you passionate about?

Answer these questions and start taking actions in that direction. Let your passions, your heart, your deep desires lead you and figure out how to fit the rational pieces in. For instance, if you want to be a musician go be a musician! But if you also want to make money figure out how to combine those two things. The easiest way is to find someone who is doing what you want to do. Start learning, start modeling them. It’s definitely a place to start.  But remember: Passion first, logistics second.

Do lots of different things

Explore. Dip your toe in new experiences. Think about what you’d like to do and try. Then, take ACTION. Go try them. Test the waters. The sooner you are able to discern what you want and don’t want the sooner you’ll see a clear path. Don’t stay in your box. Get outside yourself! You’re options are limited by what you know. And so, be in the pursuit of gaining new knowledge. It will give you an edge. It will help you see the direction you want to go in.

Go to work on you

In a world that conditions us that success is about external validation, the best thing you can do at this time in your life is go to work on you. Learn how to communicate like a master. Discover how to become influential. Learn how to control your emotions. This is what truly gives you the power in life to do anything.

Emotional intelligence training – focusing on building your personal skills of thinking and communication – will allow you to achieve anything you want. When you work on your own personal power you take that power everywhere you go. You experience a new way of living. You learn what success really is.

Tap into the resources around you, seek out new ones. Learn how to generate ideas. Discover how make money from ideas (aka build businesses)

And then, learn how to shift your emotions so when you feel bad you can flip the switch to feeling good. It’s powerful and it will give you strength when you are confused and feeling lost in your 20s.

You can start now. Start here. Go read some articles or grab so free personal development tools. If you want more info on quarter life crisis, grab this: Quarter Life Crisis ebook – free copy 

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Feeling lost and confused? How to free yourself

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Feeling lost and confused happens to everyone one or more times (usually more)  in their life. It’s an excruciating experience. Being directionless is mentally agonizing. This is because when you have no plan for your future because you’re unclear about your next steps, you’ll be paralyzed when it comes to taking action and making progress. You’ll feel and be totally stuck. So what do you do to gain some mental relief? How do you free yourself from feeling lost and confused? Read on…

Feeling lost and confused

Feeling lost and confused?

Feeling lost and confused? How to free yourself

Like a seasoned surfer that surfs the waves you need to do the same. You’d never see a surfer trying to surf against the wave, against the current? That would be illogical. It would be totally ridiculous.

So the first thing to do when you’re feeling lost and confused is allow yourself to feel that way. Don’t resist it. Just be in the space of being lost and confused. Do your best to stop trying to solve your problem. You will want to because people are inquisitive. Humans like to know WHY. We like to solve things, especially our problems. Though, when you find yourself trying to force yourself out of feeling lost you’ll make it worse.

The first thing to do is to get that you feel lost and confused right now. Know that it’ll will pass soon. Surrender to how you feel. Continue to engage in your regular life. Do your best to relieve your mental agony by pursuing activities you enjoy. Having some fun just for the sake of it is a good way to handle feeling lost and confused.

Consider what you used to do for fun when you were a kid. Paint? Sing? Dance? Play a sport? Pick one activity and go do it. It’ll connect you to you and may drum up some inspiration. It might even be the thing that frees you.

Feeling lost vs. feeling lost and confused and totally in the dark!

There are two types of feeling lost. Sometimes you find yourself feeling lost simply because you haven’t decided what your next actions are. Sometimes it takes simply considering your options and choosing your next action. When you start to take new actions you’ll feel better. You’ll gain traction.

But sometimes, it’s far worse. You feel lost and totally and utterly confused. No matter what you try to do you have no idea where you’re going in life. The more you try and solve the problem, the more you entertain ideas and mentally visualize possible futures, the less clear you feel. The experience is one of being completely in the dark or in a fog in your mind. You question everything. You question your future, your past, the actions your taking now. It feels like a full on existential crisis.

There’s a term for feeling lost and confused that many spiritual leaders use: “the dark night of the soul”. When you’re in a dark night period it’s suggested that it’s because you come out of a major period of personal transformation (many times it comes after a major personal failure or loss). It’s like you’re shedding a piece of who you used to be and a new, more advanced and full of wisdom you is going to emerge.

What this means, is the dark night stage you’re experiencing is a GOOD THING even if it doesn’t feel like it.

What to do about feeling lost and confused

Once again, the best way to get through it is to surrender and wait it out. It’ll pass. The sooner you surrender the faster you’ll speed the process. The faster you’ll get to feeling great again. And when you are feeling great you will be bursting with ideas and inspiration and power!

Surrendering doesn’t sound fun though, does it? Especially when it feels so excruciating when you don’t know what to do. Or if you are depressed. So how do you relieve the mental agony? Here are three tips…

Step 1: Believe in something bigger than yourself

Anytime you feel yourself being pulled down by the negative emotions you’re going through that’s when you have to dig deep and conjure up some major belief. Believe that this stage will pass like all other periods in your life. Emotions are transient. They don’t last forever even it feels like they will.

Believe that when the fog clears you’ll wake up one day with major inspiration. Believe that a more powerful you is emerging. If you’re able to grasp onto these beliefs it will help. If these beliefs don’t work for you think of some empowering ones to have. You might want to simply keep saying to yourself :”this will pass soon”.

Step 2: Be a tad more selfish than usual

Do what you got to do to feel better. That might mean sleeping in one day (or more than just one). It might mean having some alone time away from friends and family. It might mean sitting on the couch watching reality TV and eating some ice cream and crying. Allow yourself to feel the negative emotions. Don’t indulge them but feel them. Let yourself purge. Allow yourself to be imperfect. Let yourself be human.

It’s okay to fall off your “keeping it all together wagon” sometimes. Just don’t get stuck in it. DON’T pity yourself. DON’T be a negative tornado around other people. And communicate with the people you love. Tell them: “I’m feeling a bit directionless and uncertain right now I might need to have more alone time than I usually do so I can work through it”, or “I’m sorting out what’s next for me and it doesn’t feel great. If I’m being too negative please know I’m working through something and it’s not about you. I won’t feel bad if you need some space away from me right now”.

DO take positive actions – like going for a massage or taking a bath – to lesson the emotional sting. Go an get lost in an activity.

Step 3: Ask empowering questions

You’re in control of what you say to yourself and other people. Be aware of what you ask yourself. Most people in a dark night stage find themselves asking questions like:

  • “Why is this happening”
  • “Why me?”
  • “It’s all their fault”
  • “Will this ever end?”
  • “Am I depressed”.

If you ask yourself a disempowering question you will get a disempowering answer. You’ll reinforce your negative swirl.

Instead, ask: What’s next for me?

A better question to ask is: “what’s next for me?”, “Universe (or whatever God you believe in), what would you have me do right now?”. Ask positive questions. And remember: The quality of your questions match the quality of the response you get.

If you’re feeling lost and confused, today take one action forward. Action is the fastest way out of feeling lost. Any action. Action equals new results and it will move you forward when you’re stuck. So, if you cling to any advice in this article let it be this: Take one new action.

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Feeling lost and lonely? Here’s what to do about it…

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At one point in your life, you will find yourself feeling lost and lonely. You won’t know what to do and it will feel excruciatingly miserable. It feels terrible because happiness is linked to making progress. You feel great when you’re moving in a forward direction towards what you’d like to achieve in your life. When you’re not, it’s mentally agonizing. Feeling lonely, as well, only makes it worse.

And of course, feeling lost and lonely is usually a matched set. This is because no one wants to talk openly about it. It’s common to share about your triumphs when life is great. But, when life is directionless the inclination is to hide how you feel (and hide from people) until you sort it out.

If you’re suffering in silence and googling for clarity, this article will provide you some immediate relief.

Here’s a step by step method to your way back…

Surrender to how you feel

When you feel lost you can be damn sure you’ll do your best to think your way out of it.  You’ll immediately start asking yourself why you feel the way you do . You’ll come up with reasons to validate why. Then, you’ll start trying to figure out what you need to do to feel better and gain some traction in life.

But here’s the kicker about feeling lost: Sometimes you know WHY you feel the way you do. And, you’ll have some ideas of WHAT to do, but you can still feel foggy and unclear. You’ll still find yourself grappling and you will still feel confused and uncertain about what to do.

The first thing to do is accept where you’re at. Accept the uncomfortable feelings and thoughts your having. Surrender to this moment in your life. Stop fighting it. Stop trying to figure things out. Just do your best to BE with the way things are, without the need to fix it.

Relinquish control and get immediate peace

When you force change to occur, you’ll create resistance. If you have thoughts like “I shouldn’t feel this way” or “I need to do something about this” you are trying to force too much. Relinquish control and you’ll get some immediate peace.

The more you try and force yourself to feel better the worse you’ll make the situation. Anytime you try and force situations and emotions to change you’ll create resistance. This will extend your period of feeling lost. You don’t want to do this.

When you’re feeling lost and lonely, accepting where you’re at probably doesn’t inspire you too much.

But the best thing to do is say to yourself: “Where I’m at right now in my life is the perfect place for me to be. Clarity is soon to come.” Do your best to chill out and be in a state of wonder. Wonder what’s next to emerge in your life. Start to be inquisitive. Try on ideas and possible future pathways in your mind like you’re shopping for clothes that fit.

What you resist persists. So surrender and get that this is jus at period you’re in right now. It will pass as all stages and emotions do.

Don’t make rash decisions

You might feel like making some radical changes when you feel lost and alone, such as: Break up with a partner, quit a job, move across the country. Don’t do anything major. Carry on with your regular day-to-day life as best you can. Distract yourself from your negative thoughts. Refocus on new projects and other people. Your sense of feeling lost will fade. Clarity will come. Wait it out.

Decisions need to be made only when you feel good. When you make decisions when you’re in a negative state you’re reacting to life versus taking an active approach to life. Decisions made when you feel bad will never turn out well.

Share authentically

You’re innate ability to share is a gift. Sharing is a bridge out of the darkness of your mind. It builds connections with others. It creates an access from you to the world. Sharing helps inspiration, hope, belief and love to flow to you.

There’s strength in sharing authentically about how you feel with people you trust and love, and sometimes even strangers.  The catch is you won’t feel like sharing about the fact you’re feeling lost and lonely. Do it anyways! (You can still do something even if you don’t feel like it. It’s like getting out of bed on a Monday morning when you feel like sleeping in).

But if you’re brave enough to say to a few people “you know, I’ve been feeling a bit directionless at this point in my life”, you’ll likely get some immediate relief. You’ll likely see you’re not alone in your experience. You’ll see how people are willing to help. You may even get some inspiration. Perhaps a new opportunity will show up. Or, you’ll connect with someone on a deeper level.

Lastly, share authentically but also make sure you’re not sharing over and over with the same person or being super negative. Sharing about your struggle is different than bitching complaining. Don’t be an energy sucker for other people.

Take care of your physical health

Crappy food. No fresh air. No exercise. This will certainly NOT help.

Focus right now on taking care of your body, mind and spirit. Do what you need to do to feel good. Make sure you’re not overloading on sugar, caffeine, or fast food. Get outside. Move your body. Eat well. Nourish yourself.

This includes feeding your brain with positive information and knowledge. Listen to an audiobook that inspires you. Evaluate the content you take in daily. Weed out the crap.

Watch what you say!

Pay close attention to the language you use when you’re with others and what you say to yourself. Shift the jargon you use so it’s lighter and more objective. For instance, if you keep saying to yourself and others: “I feel like shit. I don’t know what to do”, a slight change to: “I haven’t been feeling to best. I’m seeking inspiration” will take the sting off of the way you feel and help you’re focus shift. It will help you remain open to new possibilities during an uncomfortable time.

When you speaking negatively you train your brain to carve out and speed up more negative pathways. So take control of your language, make some slight changes. It will help you to start thinking more objectively and to be more open-minded.

Feeling lonely? Go be around people

Loneliness is voluntary. When you feel alone, go be around people. Call someone. Go on the Internet and connect with someone. Simply putting yourself in an atmosphere of people — a shopping mall, a farmers market, a beach, a Starbucks — can help pull you out of your funk.

You also might have moments where you want to be alone. Go be in nature and think. Sit quietly. Take a bath and feel the warm water on your body. Do whatever you need to do to feel good.

Have more fun

Reconnect with your inner child. Play. Do something pointless and random that you like to do for no reason at all. Getting lost in fun will help you find yourself.

  • Try an adult coloring book.
  • Listen to a genre of music that’s new to you.
  • Borrow someone’s dog or cat for a weekend.
  • Eat food you never tried.
  • Seek out new people and experiences.
  • Do cartwheels in the park.
  • Go fishing.

Finally, here is the bottom line on feeling lost and lonely. It’s temporary, and therefore it will not last. You will find yourself and your passion again. You can give up feeling lonely and rejoin the world. Re-read this guide and apply the advice and you’ll get there sooner.

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