How to love yourself

I used to wonder if it would ever be possible for me to love myself. In my early twenties I saw this as a place I would never be able to get to. Now, I chuckle as I am reminded of that time. This idea, this struggle of not being able to love myself, I remember it vividly though it’s inconceivable to me now. I’ve done a ton of work on my relationship with myself. A decades worth. It’s ongoing, in fact. And in this post I’ll share some nuggets I’ve learned for anyone who is struggling with how to love yourself.

How to love yourself

How to love yourself 

Loving yourself is not some place to get to, you can flip that switch today. At this very moment. That might tick you off and some of you reading this might want to kick me for saying this (but I’ll tell you how below): Loving yourself is a decision.

It’s a decision you alone can make. It’s a decision you don’t just make once but constantly. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.

This is really hard idea to understand, especially when you’re struggling with how to love yourself. So how do you flip the switch?

The first step to a better relationship with you…

Well, first you have to accept the struggle you’re in. Stop asking yourself “why can’t I love myself?” and stop getting caught up in the WHY of it all. Just accept that at this moment, right now, you don’t love yourself.

It’s easy for you to get caught up in trying to figure out why you don’t love yourself and how to get there. But this thinking will only lead you in circles and keep you stuck. So first stop asking why. It’s time to start asking yourself new questions. And commit this to memory: The quality of the questions you ask yourself is equal to the quality of the life you live.

If you ask yourself questions like “why can’t I love myself?” you’ll search for answers. The reason you come up with will only validate the struggle. It will stop you from changing the way you think and feel and how you treat yourself in future. So notice the why questions that you’re asking yourself that are negative and don’t work. Now, fill that space with a new question, like….

How can I learn to love myself?

How can I be kind to myself today?

What can I do – one simple action today – to change the way I feel about myself?

What qualities do I love and appreciate about myself?

These are better questions and they’ll help you to shift how you feel. And remember, you have to be willing to let the love in. Start small. Think of one quality you love about yourself and let that be your focus.

When you internally ask why questions, most of the time you’ll stay caught up in the past. That’ll never serve you to move forward. The why doesn’t matter. The what’s next does.

The only one who suffers from not loving yourself is you. And this negativity will permeate into all areas of your life and all the choices you make. You’ll choose partners that aren’t good for you or don’t treat you well. Your career will reflect the worth you give yourself and that will expand into the areas of finance and your lifestyle. It’s all connected.

Accept the way you feel and give yourself a moment to feel it

When you’re in a space of struggling and wondering how to love yourself. The best thing to do is stop everything and go be by yourself somewhere. Get quiet. Feel how you feel. Give yourself five or ten minutes to feel the negative emotions you have for yourself. If you’re mad about something you did in the past, allow yourself to feel the anger you have for yourself. If you hate you’re body, allow yourself a few moment to feel really sad, frustrated about your body.

Emotions are like the knots of tension you can get in your physical body. When you put pressure on a muscle from physically working it, the build up of lactic acid will cause an uncomfortable knot to occur. To release the knot you have to put pressure on it. You have to push into the knot for the tension to release. It’s the same with emotions. Feel them. Don’t suppress or avoid them, you have to feel them and then they dissolve. Your negative thoughts will literally weaken and dissolve.

So, right now, if you’re reading this and you’re feeling negatively towards yourself, take a moment to close your eyes. Take yourself back to a moment that triggers your feelings and allow yourself to feel them. It’s surprisingly a very calming and therapeutic experience to go through.

Fill the space with something positive, something new

After you feel and release the emotional tension, think of one thing you’re grateful for. Something simple. It could be your heart, a tree outside, the home you live in, or a person you love. Feel how grateful you are.

Then, when you’re feeling positive, think of one wonderful trait about yourself or a great thing you’ve accomplished in your life. Follow this with scheduling one nice thing you could do for yourself today. One small action that would help you to feel good about yourself.

Make this a ritual

Loving yourself involves training. If you’ve spent years having negative thoughts about yourself, it’s going to take a while for your relationship with you to change. So anytime you feel mad, sad, frustrated, angry at yourself or about yourself, stop and allow yourself to feel your negative emotions. Follow this with a thought of gratitude and recognize something great about yourself. Then, take one action that day to love yourself. Consider this your new regular – perhaps daily – ritual.

Any mindset shift requires emotional leverage

Even though you want to change, you’ll continue to be and think negatively about yourself until you get the impacts it’s causing on your life and behavior. If you really want to make a shift, if you really want to start loving yourself more, you need to really get what you’ve been missing out on by allowing yourself to think this way about yourself.

The best way to do this, is to take some time to write out a list of the all the impacts of you thinking this way. What are the impacts on you and your life? If you don’t love yourself, what are the impacts on other people? What are the impacts in your relationships? What are the global impacts? Seriously, what are the impacts on the world.

Whether you believe that there are impacts on the world at large, there are. Every person on this planet has a gift to give. Are you contributing your gifts? Are you making a difference? Are you leaving this world better than the one you came into?

Hating yourself is like a doubled-edged sword. Whatever you think internally expresses itself externally. If you don’t love yourself it’ll be all over your life and the results you can produce.

You really want to get this. Getting the impacts will help you realize that you have to put in the effort to change. When you get the impacts the choice to love yourself becomes easy and critical.

What to do when you really can’t think anything positive about yourself

Find someone to hold you bigger than you hold yourself. Find someone to love you. Find someone to treat you well. A sibling. A friend. A parent. A relative. A colleague. A coach. A therapist. Find someone who will hold you to your greatness. Find someone to love and acknowledge you and who will tell you your great.

Then, it’s your job to listen.

And it’ll probably take you a long time to let the love in. But just keep trying.

I know this from experience. In my early twenties, I am grateful to have had a mentor that took me under his wing. He said to me: “you’re a beautiful gift to the world”. Every time he said it, it felt ridiculous to me. It felt wrong. I didn’t believe it. But the more he told this too me, the more I start to let this idea come into my own head.

Overtime, things shifted and I started to care more for myself. Eat better. Sleep enough. Have a bit more fun. Eat nutritious foods (like soursop). I started to treat myself kindly. I started to see how my negative chatter didn’t work. We all need other people to see us bigger than we see ourselves. Sometimes we need it more.

So find someone to hold you big until you can hold yourself.

One thing you can do today to start loving yourself more today…

Set a timer on your mobile device or computer. When it goes off acknowledge one great thing about yourself. Pat yourself on the back daily for something good you’ve done or a trait you love about yourself. Remind yourself to do this, until it becomes natural.

And don’t forget…loving yourself is a double edged sword. Put the love in and it’ll flow out. Your life will expand from simply loving yourself a little more each day.

secrets of successful entrepreneurs

Secrets of Successful Entrepreneurs

The Internet has made building and running a business far more accessible than it used to be. Anyone can cheaply and easily build a website, set up shop quickly in a global marketplace, and work from home in their pajamas. So here’s a selection of the secrets of successful entrepreneurs that I have learned over my 20s.

As an entrepreneur, I can tell you what a fulfilling career it is. I’m 29 today and I built my first business when I was 21. This is why, like many of my millennial pals, I can’t imagine working for someone else. Though I did initially. As many entrepreneurs do, I worked a 9 to 5 job (until I was 26) while building my own businesses on the side.

secrets of successful entrepreneurs

The view from my office.

So, I remember what it was like to… Have someone else rule my financial destiny. Wake up at 5am for a one-hour (sometimes two-hour) commute to the office. Request permission for time off. Ugh!

I also remember how creatively starved I felt. I had to defer to the higher-ups to make key decisions. They ultimately controlled the destiny of the business.

These are some of the reasons many people switch to entrepreneurship:

The lifestyle allows you to be fully self-expressed in your career. It provides you full ownership of your time and money. And, there is no roof on your income potential! All of these are priceless.

But, if you choose the entrepreneurial route, step into it with your eyes wide open. Its has its challenges.
For wannabe entrepreneurs, and those in the throes of building a business, there are pitfalls you’ll want to avoid. Follow the rules below to fast track to business ownership success:

 

Secrets of Successful Entrepreneurs

Build a war chest

Having little money to support yourself is a surefire way to get in action fast, but it’s extremely stressful. Financial stress is debilitating. It will impact your ability to make smart choices for your business. You may find yourself making decisions based on fast-money versus thinking about what the business needs. Too many people quit their jobs before their business is stable.
That being said, it can be tough and exhausting to work in a high-pressure role for another company while building a business.

Before you jump into entrepreneurship, ensure you have an ample war chest, or build it around a full-time job. Make sure you have an income or structure that supports basic survival needs. At a minimum, you need to have enough money to cover housing, an Internet connection (of course), a mobile phone, groceries, and transportation expenses like a car, subway, bike or bus, etc. The private jet comes later!

Don’t expect overnight success

Successful entrepreneurs can make running a business look glamorous and easy. Ever watch an ad for a webinar about becoming an entrepreneur? They show scenarios like this: A millennial entrepreneur stands in front of a giant mansion with a pool, his laptop at his side. He shares a story about how he has automated his business. He makes millions and spends his time traveling the world.

While this life is possible for entrepreneurs, what’s left out of this story is the time it takes to build a successful business, and the struggles most entrepreneurs go through.

Similar to many of my entrepreneur friends, when I built my first business I had a bit of a “build it and they will come” mentality. I created a beautiful website, got some fancy business cards and started hitting networking events.

But I soon found that clients weren’t flocking to me as I had envisioned. It was my first hard lesson in the importance of learning about my target market first and doing more work to build a killer brand that would attract the right people.

Rarely are new businesses overnight successes. It takes time and a great deal of determination. Many entrepreneurs fail because they aren’t patient. Entrepreneurship requires mental toughness, immovable resilience and a granite-chiselled conviction to succeed.

A great idea for a new company is easy to churn out. However, the real work is creating a business that serves an unmet market. You may discover you need to tweak your initial strategy, sometimes many times over before you hit growth and revenue that will support your dream life (or frankly that even pays the rent or mortgage).

A business can take years to build, even when you’re following the advice of experts and doing all the right things. Be patient, determined and believe in yourself.

Be flexible and adapt your plan

Businesses sometimes fail because the person running the company is an artist or creator and not a true entrepreneur. To succeed you need to be both business-minded and creative. You need to be willing to do the books, create the products, build a team and hire people, open the mail and be social media savvy all at once!

Like most entrepreneurs, you may find that some of these jobs are not your strengths. And worse, you’ll hate doing a few of them. For instance, I handle the books for the digital marketing agency my husband and I own, and I don’t particularly enjoy it. But it’s a requirement for the business, and I like saving the money and being involved knowing what’s going on in the company finances.

You also need to be a strategist. That means deciding and choosing what the business needs by listening to what your customers need, not what you want to create. These are two very different approaches.

For example, let’s say you want to run a successful clothing boutique. You create a target market, then purchase an initial inventory of clothing that you love and think will be great. Now, you can be an artist and continue to buy items you like, or you could pay attention to what the hot items are selling, and buy more of those. Too bad if you don’t like the in colors or fashion trends. That doesn’t mean you can’t bring your own flare to the inventory you buy, just make sure it also moves off the shelves and keeps you in business.

Entrepreneurs are willing to crush all their notions and ideas about how their business should work. They let the business lead. They take themselves out of the equation.

Be 100% responsible

Young entrepreneurs often look at business as an easy way to make money in their sleep while they spend their time having fun. And yes, this is part of the beauty of living the entrepreneurial lifestyle.
However, it’s important to remember that even if you automate your business and free up your time, you’re the one in charge.

You always need to be the visionary behind business and, to think ahead. This is true even if you done a great job setting the business up so it runs without you. When your business is doing well, you must consider what it needs to stay doing well, or how it could do better. When it is struggling, you need to double your resolve and get through the hard times.

As an entrepreneur, you pay you. This is both exciting, as you have ultimate control over your financial destiny, and scary. It’s on you, and only you, that ensures the success of the business.

Find a mentor

If you want to build a successful business and you’ve never done it before, seek out a mentor. Look for someone who has a proven track record for success, and choose someone you trust.

I can guarantee that wouldn’t be in business today if it wasn’t for the mentors and life coaches I’ve had along the way. Think of it this way: An Olympic-level athlete would never train for a competition without a coach. It’s the same thing in business.

Your mentor may be someone you hire and get coached by. Or it could be a collection of online experts you follow and learn from. A mentor is paramount for your success as an entrepreneur. Building a business can be a lonely, frightening and confusing process. A mentor will teach and guide you. Use them to answer questions and bounce ideas off.

Find a incredible business person who is willing to be your mentor and suck all the business marrow out of them. For many successful business owners getting to coach a newbie entrepreneur is a joy. They’ll be as grateful to you as you are to them.

Mastermind your way to success

Surround yourself with a group of entrepreneurs by joining or creating a mastermind group. It might be a group made up of local entrepreneurs that meets weekly in your community. Or it could be an online group that meets in forum or on a weekly Skype call.

When I recently found myself stuck in my business I remembered what I learned from a mentor: “go to your community”. I realized that in the new area I’ve recently moved to, I didn’t have a group of entrepreneurial friends. So I quickly made some requests and connect through social media. It doesn’t have to be complicated to get a few like-minded people together.

A mastermind group can provide a weekly accountability structure; a way to make sure you meet the targets you set for yourself. It also gives you a platform to ask questions, share ideas and resources, and learn from other entrepreneurs.

Learn digital marketing basics

Entrepreneurial success requires basic literacy in digital know-how. This is true, even if you hire an agency to build your website, run your email campaigns, or drive traffic to your website. Third parties care less about your business than you do, so understanding the mechanics of digital marketing and hiring experts to execute the strategy is key to your success.

You will save a great deal of money if you learn how to do the simple things like:

● Build a WordPress site from a template.
● Record a video on your mobile phone and edit it.
● Set up an email sales funnel and landing pages.
● Write enticing sales copy.

 

At minimum, you’ll need to learn how to write great blog content, and use social media platforms to promote your business.

Find a digital marketing savvy friend to school you. Or seek out online experts or groups. Take an online course. Watch tutorials on Youtube. Learn digital marketing so your business stands a chance of being seen.

Use failure to succeed

Building a business is a process. You won’t do everything perfectly. Be okay with mistakes and failure, and understand that failure is a gateway to success. The more you fail, the more you can tweak your strategy, and the closer you get to learning what works.

When you accept failure as part of the process, and not something that can stop you, you’ll be on your way to great success.

Yes, there are times when running your own business will be confusing, challenging and frustrating. Find comfort in knowing that these tiny hurdles along the way are part of the process. Believe in yourself and keep going.

Being an entrepreneur with all its challenges is an incredible livelihood. It allows you to be self-expressed in your career. You get to be in complete control of your financial destiny. And, you get to live the life of your dreams.

Listen to the audio version of this post with additional insights. Download the mp3 here. 

How to be likeable

How to be likeable …How to become the most sought after person in the room

How to be likeable

Learn the habits of exceptionally likeable people

Learn how to be an exceptionally likeable person…

It’s a scientifically proven fact that all people unconsciously answer two questions when they meet someone for the first time:

  1. Do I trust this person?
  2. Do I respect this person?

All people do this. When we trust, we feel safe. It’s linked to our base survival needs.

So where do you think you fall on the likeability scale? Think about for a moment.

Even if you self-rate fairly well, you are going to want to up your game in establishing trust and credibility with people you want to build relationships with. If you want to know how to be likeable – and for people to see that you are a trustworthy and credible person, who they must get to know – then you have found the right resource.

To cut to the chase and get our downloadable magic laws of likability,  it’s free here. Or grab our People Magnet Formula ebook on Amazon. (TIP: Free to Amazon Prime members.)

Or read on…

Here are some things you can do to learn how to be likeable:

How to be liked as soon as someone meets you

1. First and foremost, you need to be great with you

Likeable people are charismatic, engaging and curious.

Likable people are charismatic, engaging and curious.

Consider that your relationship with yourself is your foundation to everything. If you don’t trust or believe in yourself than no one else will. Likable people like themselves!

So, focusing on building and nourishing a great relationship with you is paramount for your success in all areas of life.

When you’re good with you, people will feel your vibe. They’ll feel they can trust you immediately. You’ll exude confidence and be someone other people like to be around.

2.Do what you say you’ll do like it’s a law

Honor your word. When you tell someone you’re going to be somewhere at a certain time or do something, DO IT!

When a challenge arises and you can’t do what you said you’d do, as soon as you realize the issue, communicate about it and re-promise. Be someone people can depend on because it’s rare. It’s a simple way to immediately show that you’re someone others can count on.

3.Use your body to express warmth and approachability

Use body language signals to express that you’re inviting and friendly. Don’t cross your arms or legs. Smile. When you’re listening to people lean in or nod your head to show you’re listening to them.

And dress polished too. You may also want to consider you’re unique style because they way you dress attracts specific people.

4.Be hyper-curious

The secret to how to be likeable is to be charismatic. Charisma is a quality unique to likeable people.They get highly engaged in others and they focus on them. Let people you’re with lead the conversation. When they speak, be highly interested and engage them. Make them feel as if what they are saying is magical. Not in a fake way. Really find something intriguing in what they are saying and get curious about it. Listen carefully. Everyone has a story to tell. Everyone is fascinating. Find out what makes them tick. They will walk away feeling listened to and experience that you really care – and they will like you.

5.Be authentic and truthful

Great people can easily detect liars and inauthenticity. So to learn how to be liked, one of the traits you need to take on is be open and honest. There’s nothing to hide.

Admit to your mistakes when you make them. We all make mistakes and when you are honest about them, you show you’re someone that can be trusted. Tell on yourself. Here’s a quick example: “Not very many  people know this, but I was fired from my first  job. But I kind of deserved it.  After that I smartened up. But what I learn from that was…”

Use these five tactics and you’ll be instantly likeable.

And, if you’re someone who wants to be seen as extraordinary in business and life you’ll want to grab this free PDF guide: 11 Laws of Likeability. It’ll have you make incredible first and lasting impressions with everyone you meet.

How to be liked

How to get better at asking for help

How to ask for help …and why you should ask more often

How to ask for help

How to ask for help and why you should ask more often… and

Learn how to ask for help…

Most people suck at asking for help. And, I’m not talking about asking for help when you’re in crisis. I’m talking about turning to people on your social feeds (like Twitter and Facebook) and in your life for support with the little things you get stuck with.

It’s really not difficult. These days, the Internet has made asking for help a no-brainer.

But if you’re like most people, you are not asking for help when you should. Take a moment to consider – what are you stuck with right now ? Who in your communities (online and offline) could you ask for advice, guidance or fresh ideas?

Now, why haven’t you asked? What’s in the way of you asking?

Pride? Perhaps.

Are you embarrassed to ask for help?

You’re embarrassed? Could be.

Think you know everything and can solve everything yourself. Maybe?

Don’t want to bother someone? Yeah, that may seem like a valid reason, but most people actually LOVE to help.

Now, this may surprise you, here is the most common and overlooked reason why most people don’t ask for help when they’re stuck:

Asking for help is not a habit you’ve developed

If you rarely ask for support, you’re probably used to doing things yourself.  This is the case for most people.

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes waiting to ask for help is a good thing. It’s important you use your own brain power and resources to solve issues yourself. It’s how you become a good problem-solver and feel confident about your abilities to navigate and survive.

But, if you’re like most people, you do too much yourself and wait far too long to get help. Which means, you get stuck far longer than you need to.

So, how do you get better at asking for help? DO IT. Look at what you’re challenged by right now in your goals – it could be business (e.g. How to I get more media exposure? how do I land more customers?) or in your personal life (e.g. I want to meet someone amazing. Or, I am having trouble in my relationship/marriage.)

Think about who you could ask. Asking for support takes practice. So commit to asking one person for help today or this week.

When you ask for help, it just makes practical sense. That’s especially true if you want to be successful in business and life. But, here are some other reasons to develop the habit…

Why you should ask for help more often 

Why you should ask for help more often

1) You’ll achieve what you want in a shorter amount of time

Get stuck in your business or personal life? Try and figure it out first, but if you can’t, turn to your communities. Ask 1 to 3 people and it’s likely you’ll find a quick solution. What that really means is, you spend less time wasting time and more time being in action!

2) You’ll increase your productivity levels

Have a million things to manage? Ask for help in your business or personal life. That means making requests of other people to help you manage the tasks that need to get done. 

3) You may learn something that leads to massive success

Get inspired. When you ask others for help sometimes the answer that comes back is instantly inspiring. You’ll be introduced to ideas you never thought of. It will expand your thinking in massive ways. And give you new ways to solve problems and overcome barriers.

4) You’ll reduce error

People who have been there before you in a specific situation may share valuable wisdom and insight that will steer you away from making similar mistakes that they made. 

5) You’ll create deeper bonds

Here’s a good reason. Share your struggles and ask for help because it tightens the bonds between you and the people in your communities. More allies strengthens your efforts. And it opens the door for them you to help them. You might even make a sale or two in your business along the way. 

You give another person an opportunity

People really love to help others. Most people will jump at the opportunity. They feel flattered to be asked. Contributing to you and helping you makes them feel incredible! Just think of a time where someone asked you for your expertise. Didn’t you feel good to give guidance?

So, how do you get started? What do you need to do to actually get in action versus just read this blog post and think to yourself “hmmm…I should get in action more,” but then, not do it. Here are some simple actions you can take today:

1: Just do it

Seriously. Ask for help or make a request of someone today. It can be small. You can do it through email or social media. But really take a look at where you’re stuck, consider who you could ask and then ask. Keep it short and concise and to the point. Stop right here and go write a quick email to ask for something. Go on…then come back because there’s more cool stuff below!

2: Learn how to be an effective request maker

There’s a communication formula you can learn and when you use it you’ll be able to make a request of someone and get a “yes”. You can grab the tool here as it will make you more confident in making requests.

3: Use Quora

Sign up on Quora. Ask any question on any topic.  See what answers you get. (You can find me there too)

4: Use the Ask Kay feature on the ALC site for anything you’d like coaching on

You’ll receive coaching within 24 hours over email for only $1 per question. Use it for FREE the first time you use it.

5: Find an expert on Clarity

Hire an expert in almost any field on Clarity. Advice costs $0.30 to $20 per minute, depending on the credentials of the expert you talk to.

6. Start or join a mastermind group

A mastermind group is a team of about five or six people who are looking to achieve success in the same area of life. They usually meet once a week on a call or in-person to trade ideas and support one another. Join one online or in your area or start your own.

You have the reasons. You have the options for actions. Massive results can come from one small action today.

And, to get ongoing support with all your up to in your life join Awesome Life Club if you haven’t already. It’s the free club on the web dedicated to your greatness.

How my dog transformed me

Dogs are brilliant teachers if you’re willing to listen to their lessons

Life teaches us lessons at every turn and even in surprising moments. Today (Aug. 26) is National Dog Day and it’s no exception. So it’s a good day to share with you how my dog transformed me.

As a life coach I’m used to training other people, but some of the biggest lessons come from my own life. This is the the story about a badly behaved dog and how I learned to love her…

Two years ago, my husband wanted a dog for Christmas. He whined and complained like a two year old about it for weeks. So while we had just moved into a new house and had a young baby, I gave in.

I searched for an entire month and found the perfect dog for our family. His name is Lt. General Battles and he is 120 lbs of love. He’s a gentle giant. He is sweet well-trained and quite a genius. We love him and have never met anyone who doesn’t. He’s a rockstar of a dog.

Lt. General Battles and I

Lt. General Battles and I enjoying each other’s company in the dog park near our home.

The day we picked up Battles from the humane society we saw a sad hound mix lying sadly in a cage next to him. Our heart ached for her and we couldn’t leave her. So, we adopted two dogs that day, Battles and Gracie.

I’ve loved Battles from day one. To me, he is perfect.

Gracie, well, she’s a bit of nutcase. She doesn’t listen, she has accidents in the house from time to time, she tears up our furniture. Gracie is a nervous wreck. And we’ve tried many things to help the poor thing to no avail.

Gracie the hound mix.

Gracie the hound mix.

I’d like to love her like I love Battles, but man, this dog makes it really hard.

How my dog transformed me

Then, the other night something happened that was transformational for me and for my relationship with her. I looked at Gracie and had the following series of thoughts…

Geez Gracie, why do you have to be such a dumbass? You make it so hard for me to love you. I’d like to, but you’re such an idiot. 

Well, she’s not really an idiot, she’s just a dog.

And, she’s been through a lot of hurt. In her past, people were really mean to her. 

It makes sense that she’s fearful and nervous and has accidents. It makes sense that she has trouble being loving with people. 

Poor thing.

Wow, she kind of reminds me of me.

I was hurt in the past by people when I was a kid. And while I’ve gotten over it, I still have trouble sometimes. I can still be stingy with my love for other people. Sometimes I avoid getting too close to others out of a fear of being hurt by them. 

And, I thought to myself:

I’ve been stingy loving her because she’s not perfect. It’s the same thing I’ve gotten mad at people in my past for doing to me.

I haven’t given her the unconditional love she deserves. So she’s not perfect. Battles really isn’t either. No one is perfect. No dog. No human.

What if I just loved her and loved everyone regardless of what they do or don’t do. Love Gracie and others unconditionally like I love my young son. It’s like people need to meet certain “measures” to gain my love. 

If I’m doing it to my dog, who else am I doing this to?

How I transformed my dog

From that moment, I committed to shifting this in myself.  A good life coach is always looking at what’s missing. I’ve decided to make an effort to be loving with Gracie and with people in my life. To make an effort to be compassionate and kinder with strangers, even.

Since this revelation, Gracie and I have connected. She comes to me for pets and attention. She never did that before. The other night I let her up on couch even and we cuddled.

I know that as I continue to make progress with her I’ll give her a real chance to understand that humans are really loving and not to be feared, that she doesn’t need to be nervous. I also give myself a chance to open up my heart more with not just her but other people.

What is your dog trying to teach you?

And so, since it’s National Dog Day, here is the takeaway: There is so much to learn in every moment of life, including from our dogs.

What is your dog trying to teach you?

Perhaps, it’s to relax and take it easy. Maybe it’s to have more fun. Or, maybe it’s to open your heart and love unconditionally.

Today take a moment to ponder: What is your dog trying to teach you? And see what the answer is!

And, if you haven’t already, join the coolest free club on the web dedicated to your greatest: Join Awesome Life Club.