No energy? 6 Surprisingly simple ways to amp it up

No energy? 6 Surprisingly simple ways to amp it up

Suffering from no energy? Feel tapped out? Exhausted? Sluggish? At the end of the day do you want to just sack out on the couch.

You may be super inspired to get more done, move your life forward and start a business, write a book, renovate your home or volunteer your time. Most people have at least one key project that they want to get done, but there is a often one thing in the way to getting it done.

Think of one major accomplishment you’d like to achieve in the near future? Got it?

What do you think is in the way? What’s the number one reason you have for why you don’t have what you want? Is it… Time? Money? Willpower? There is one sneaky culprit that most people never consider. And this one affects all the other variables. The most common big, bad, dream-killing culprit is: No energy.

At the end of the day, you probably don’t have any reserves to take that next step, get in action and get your pet project started.

Low energy, or no energy is the culprit

Most people are just tapped out. They don’t have the energy to start one more task, even if they are inspired to get it done. Low energy, or no energy is the culprit.

Energy is your baseline. It’s a critical force, such that if lost all your energy, you’d have nothing. You’ll understand this if you’ve ever been acutely or chronically sick…or cared for someone in that condition.

When you operate your life on no energy, your ability to get things done is seriously hampered. You don’t want to work. Your thinking becomes foggy. It’s hard to focus. You may even want to avoid other people when you’re energetically tapped out. That’s energy loss at its worst.

However, most people take their energy stores for granted. They don’t realize they are operating  with very low energy. In fact, most people use energy boosting substances to try to charge themselves up to generate more energy. Things like: Caffeine, sugar, or in some cases pharmaceuticals or narcotics.

It’s not your fault if you fall into that camp. Most of us use artificial stimulants like caffeine or sugar.  We don’t have the facts straight on the best ways to amp up our energy stores. Here’s why: Few people are properly educated on how to feel more energized.

How to get your energy back

Read on and you’ll learn some very simple ways to up amp up your energy levels. You’ll see how you can get more done, and feel one thousand times better in body, mind and spirit.

What does that means for your life? Perhaps, an extra couple hours at the end of your work day to jump into that project you’ve been thinking about, but you’ve been too tired to put into action. Or more energy might simply heighten your level of thinking and focus so you can perform better in all areas of your life.  When you feel energetically awesome, you really become unstoppable.

No energy? 6 Surprisingly simple ways to boost energy stores

No energy? 6 Surprisingly simple ways to amp it up

Energy Booster 1: Drink more water

Your body is made up of 75% water. You have 75% water in your muscles. Your bones are 25% water. Water is a life sustaining solvent. It regulates the functions of all your systems.

If you feel like you have no energy one of the simplest energy boosters is to drink more water. You’ve likely been told that before. Are you doing it? If not, what’s in the way for you? If you hate the taste, inject your water with fruit or citrus. Make it interesting. As a general rule you should be drinking 4 pints, or about 2 litres, of water per day. If you drink a lot of juice, coffee or soda you’ll need to drink even more. Sugary drinks or caffeinated beverages are energy suckers. You’ll also want to cut back on caffeine, sugar and alcohol. These can be hard to do, but it’s rewarding if you can make small to moderate changes.

Here’s what happens when you consume sugar, caffeine or alcohol: You’ll get a surge in energy from your glucose levels spiking and dopamine (a happy brain chemical) flooding your brain. The surge will bring you high and then drop you really low. Your body will react by feeling even less energized and craving more sugar, caffeine or alcohol.

No 1 energy booster is water

Water is a major energy booster. Infuse it with fruit to make it interesting

When it comes to drinking more water it’s about balance and conditioning. If you’re not an avid water drinker and the mere idea is a turn off then start to replace one drink per day with a glass of water. Continue to up your water consumption and minimize your sugar, caffeine, alcohol consumption each week. It’s about incremental progress. This is also because your brain and body have gotten used to your routine. So don’t freak your body out because you’re cravings will get worse. Just slowly replace and balance. Pretty quickly you’ll find it makes a mega difference. You may even find you become a water-aholic. (It happened to me. I was a former “I hate water, it’s boring” kinda person. Now I always have a glass nearby and I love how I feel).

Energy Booster 2: Move your body gently

While I was writing this article I started to feel a bit lethargic. I felt like I had no energy.  I was having trouble focusing, keeping my eyes opened and felt like I needed a boost. So what did I do? Instead of reaching for a coffee or a candy bar, I stood up and put on some music (“The Club Can’t Handle Me Right Now” by Flo Rida, to be exact) and I shook my booty. I danced around my home office to get my heart rate up and put myself in a good mood. It took me probably less time than it would have taken if I went downstairs to grab a sugary snack or drink and I immediately felt energized. I jumped back into my writing and made quick progress.

If you work in an office where everyone is watching you, a bit of boogie at your desk may not be possible. You might have to leave the area and go for a short brisk walk for a 5-minutes instead. Getting your heart rate up makes an immediate difference. You don’t have to do much. Simply raising your arms up and thrusting them back down toward your shoulders while you breathe in and out will do the trick. Do 30 reps and you’ll feel an immediate difference. Try and take in as much and expel as much air as possible. Do it now even and you’ll feel a difference.

The important thing to remember is when it comes to energy: You get back what you generate.

If you want to increase your energy levels do more aerobic activity. Running (and not too hard, intensely enough that you could carry on a conversation), biking, swimming, yoga, these are all great activities that will amp up your energy levels versus suck them dry. This is because when you engage in aerobic fitness your body uses glycogen and fat as fuel. On the other hand, anaerobic activities – such as weight lifting, sprinting and Crossfit – are great for building muscle but they can be massive energy warping activities. When you engage in anaerobics oxygen is not present so you use glycogen as fuel. Within two hours you can deplete all your glycogen stores and you’ll hit a wall. Bottom line is: Do more aerobic activity!

Get your heart rate up, but don’t overwork your system. Many people sit at a desk all day and then kill themselves at the gym with anaerobic exercise. Instead, maximize your energy and go for a light run or brisk walk or yoga instead. Know your personal fitness goals and balance the two — aerobics and anaerobics — for best results.

Energy Booster 3: Eat a bit less and eat smart

Most people eat more than they need to. Eating is necessary and important, but what most people don’t consider is that digesting food is an energy draining activity. The more you eat during a meal, the more energy it takes to process it. Think of how tired you feel after you eat a giant meal during the holidays. When you stuff your face (which we all do, and happily, from time to time) you may quickly feel like you have no energy after the meal. All you want to do is rest. On the flip side, if you’ve ever been on a liquid cleanse you may have noticed that you had more energy. Veggies and fruits take the least amount of time to digest.

Be cognizant of the foods you eat and the amounts. Some foods take larger amounts of energy to digest than others. Protein and fat take the most time to digest. Carbs take little time but carbs that are not complex – white rice, white bread, pasta – are quick to digest but will raise your blood sugar levels which can lead to a major rise and fall in energy. As a general rule (sorry if you don’t love this idea) eat more veggies and fruits. When you eat protein eat more of it from seafood or grains like quinoa. Don’t be afraid of carbs just be smart about them. Don’t eat white carbs, eat whole grains.

Another quick tip on the food front: Eat more pickled foods like kimchi and sauerkraut. They will help you digest your food fast!

Energy Booster 4: Breathe consciously when you need an energy boost

Raise your arms to the level of your head. Pull them to your shoulders and when you do breathe out as hard as you can (snot might come out of your nose so watch out, but that’s when you know you’re doing this right). Then pump your arms back to your and inhale. Do this 30 times. Repeat the sequence until your heart is pumping.

Raising your hands and dropping them is critical because it will get your heart rate up and blood flowing. That’s what you want to have happen. You can do this anytime when you feel you have no energy. Ever been driving a far distance but you’re getting tired? Don’t stop for a coffee or soda, pull over and do this instead. Or, next time you’re working on a project and you’re feeling fatigued, try this for a quick boost.

Energy Booster 5: Be around people

Simply being in an environment near other people — like at a Starbucks — can be good for your energy levels. Positive interactions with people or even just being around people can amp up your energy massively. Your brain surges with dopamine when you make contact with other human beings. The dopamine increase is healthy. It is natural and similar to what your brain does on cocaine. Being around people packs a massive energy punch. Take a moment to think back to a time in your life with friends or family where you just had an awesome time. Think about how awesome you felt!

The important part with this energy amping rule is to be with people that are positive and not negative energy suckers. Spend time with people you like or go sit in an environment in public with strangers. If you’ve got someone to cuddle up with that’s great too. Go give your partner or kid a hug or cuddle. You’ll get a boost of oxytocin to the brain. It’s another happy energy-boosting neurochemical. If you don’t have someone around to cuddle, go get a massage. Human touch makes you feel good and energized.

Energy Amper 6: Find inspiration

What do you love to do for fun? When’s the last time you had an adventure? Go learn something new or engage in activity that’s fun for the sake of fun and has no real purpose. Lose your mind in a fun activity. If you’re really focused you’ll get in a state of flow. When you activate flow your energy levels will soar. You’re brain will flood with great new ideas.

You don’t even have to go do something to get inspired. You can simple close your eyes and daydream about a future goal you want to achieve. See yourself there and celebrating. Get into your daydream and feel how you would feel if you were there. This will give you an immediately boost of happiness and energy. And to boot, you don’t have to go anywhere. Thinking about grateful moments, or having fun or achieving awesome goals in your future will have you get excited. When you open your eyes you’ll have more energy and feel propelled to get into action.

Energy killers to limit or avoid

Life is about balance. It’s pretty tough for you to rid yourself of energy killers completely (Actually, it is next to impossible). But be cognizant of them and limit them. Balance them with the energy amping activities above and you’ll be a higher performer in all areas of your life.

  • Sugar. Get rid of sugar in your diet as much as you can. When you do eat sugar stick to natural sources like honey. Or low glycemic replacements like agave syrup. Don’t eat sugar substitutes (They are even worse!). No matter how disciplined you are around sugar, once in awhile eat that piece of cake or ice cream. Do not deprive yourself. You will be miserable.
  • Caffeine. I LOVE coffee so this one is tough for me. If you consume caffeine get it from natural sources (coffee or tea, not energy drinks). Balance your caffeine intake with plenty of water.
  • Alcohol. Same rules as caffeine apply.
  • Energy drinks and boosting substances. There are packed with sugar. If you like them, drink them in moderation. Studies show they may not be good for you.
  • Engaging in activities you hate. We all have to do things we hate sometimes (ie. reconciling company books or house cleaning) but do your best to limit these. If you HATE your job, this might be your call to action. We spend a third of our lives at work. If you hate what you do, you are robbing yourself of joy and sucking your energy dry.
  • Avoid negative people. Whether it’s friends, coworkers, neighbors or family, for the most part who you spend the majority of your time with is critical. Spend time with people that lift you up, inspire you and are good for you. Limit your exposure to negative people. Be nice to them when you are around them, but don’t be generous with the energy you spend on them. Negative people are parasites on your energy. Lots of negativity equals no energy.
  • Absorbing negative or useless information. Avoid taking in information on the Internet or TV (like the news) that has no value or is negative. It takes up useful space in your brain to think about valuable things.
  • Avoid hyper intense workouts. Multiple studies conducted on the oldest and healthiest people in the world (superagers) reveals that their physical activity is aerobic and not anaerobic. Remember that anaerobics can drain your energy. So exercise briskly, but don’t over do it.  You should be able to talk as you exercise. This will keep you in the aerobic range. Light running, brisk walking or other pulse boosting activities are ideal. They also burn fat better than anaerobic exercise.
  • Worry or stress. When you find yourself worrying or stressing about things that haven’t happened or thinking about the past too much, divert your attention. What you focus on and the thought you expend around negative stressful things will suck your energy stores dry. Your body uses glucose to think. Also, if you’re thinking negatively your cortisol level (a stress hormone) levels soars then crashes. So be cognizant of what you’re thinking about and when. Don’t let it contribute to you having no energy.

No energy equals no quality of life

Remember that the amount of energy you have equals your quality of life. So, no energy leads to lack of progress, lethargy, fatigue, lack of inspiration and ideas. When you have ample energy you become laser-focused, more productive and you feel happier. It might be worth it to apply some of the information you read in this article right away. Start small. Incremental progress and small chances overtime are the key.

How to fix your life when you’ve hit rock bottom

If you’re in a space with your life right now where you are feeling lost, or confused, or completely stuck, this article will help you figure out how to fix your life when you’ve hit rock bottom. It might happen once or multiple times. Most people experience one or more hit rock bottom moments over the course of their life. Free yourself with a few simple steps.


How to fix your life when you’ve hit rock bottom

The good news about hitting rock bottom is the only place to go is up. Especially the more rock bottom you are. Think of it this way, if you have financial issues and you file for bankruptcy there’s no worse situation you can achieve. So consider you’re in a life bankruptcy stage. There’s likely far more opportunities for you to go up right now than down at this stage of your life. Simply shifting your thinking to this realization might make you feel a tad better.

Also, consider that the more loss you suffer, the more pain you go through, the more you get to a place of nothing where you can create newly want you want for your life. The more crap you go through, the more beaten down you get by circumstances, the more mentally resilient and open you become to new opportunities.

When you’ve got nothing to lose you can create everything. The world opens up for you. This is because your mental state goes from being super rational and calculated and you just get in action. It’s a bit of a throw shit at the wall to see what sticks mentality you pick up. It’s why many of the visionaries of the world have suffered major trauma and adversity. This time in your life is a badge of honor. A new world and a better you is trying to emerge.

1. Discover, explore, decide and commit

This is the time in your life to mentally “regroup” and do some deep thinking work. It’s time to ask yourself:

What do you really, deeply want your life to be about? What do you want to achieve? What do you want to experience? From there build out what you need to do now to start taking the steps to get there.

If you have no clue or some clue of what you want start getting curious. Get googling. Research what you want. This is the perfect time to take stock. Shift your focus from what you want to change now to getting into a head space of daydreaming and imagining. When you relinquish your control of how you’d like things to go and get into a space of simply, thinking, imagining, daydreaming, that’s when inspiration and ideas about what to do next will start to formulate. Instinctively, you’ll start to know what to do.

This might sound like airy fairy advice but it’s not. Amazing things happen when you let your mind wander. It’s scientifically proven that creative connections happens when you’re not focusing on anything. Your brain goes into a mode of thinking called your Default Mode Network. This is when inspiration will strike you. Clarity will come.

When you’re inner voice or your gut or the Universe (whatever you prefer to call the pangs of intuition we all experience) strike that’s when it’s time to listen and notice. Start to start to see how you can start to take you dreams, the ideas you have for what you want in life and make them happen in reality. What are some small and simple first steps you could take to move forward.

That’s when it’s time to decide on at least one action. Then commit to taking it by scheduling the action or telling one or more people what you’re going to do. Doing this helps you create an accountability structure. It helps you take your ideas from concept to reality.

2. Build out a tangible (and basic) strategy

When you want something that you don’t have it helps to have a plan how to achieve it. Having a paln sketched out will give you a guide, direction and clarity. It will also make you feel good or excited. Because now you’ve figured out what you want and some starters actions to take to get there.

If you don’t know how to get what you want find someone you can model. Learn from people who have been there before. It’s the simplest and fastest way to figure out what to do to get what you want. What are some resources you can tap into right away?

Building an action plan is critical. A lot of people keep their ideas in their head. Capturing your ideas is important because it’s easy to lost them. When you lose direction you can always come back to a plan that’s written down.

A simple way to decide what to do is to draw a horizontal line on a piece of paper. At the end of the line write down an outcome you want to achieve. At the front of the line write down your starting point, where you are now in life. Then plot in any actions that come to mind that you can take immediately and in the near future to start progressing.

3. Take action

Once you have a vague or clear idea of the actions to take all there is for you to do is take them. Setup support structures. Schedule time frames to complete your actions. Tell people what you’re going to do. They will keep you accountable because they’ll ask you if you’ve done what you said.

Learn how to overcome fear and master your habits. These are the two major biological barriers that will get in your way of taking action. You’re physical urges are often more powerful than you’re rational mind. Train your mind to be the master.

4. Evaluate and tweak

Once you start taking action you’ll start to produce new results! Yippee! Whether the results you produce move you forward or set you back it’s good. Use the information you receive from taking action as a feedback mechanism. If what you do moves you closer to what you want then do more. If it moves you away then do less.

No matter what you do, the best advice is to: Use your adversity to your advantage. The shit you go through makes you stronger. If you use, learn from, and use personal power you gain from going through tough times you’ll be able to achieve greater success.

feeling fat and ugly

What to do when your weight gets in the way you being you

What to do if you are feeling fat and ugly

feeling fat and uglyHave you had this experience? All is great with life then one day you start to feel a bit heavier. Your clothes aren’t quite fitting like they used to. But you look at yourself and decide you still look fine. Days and weeks go by of you having this experience, feeling a bit heavier but not denying the little belly you’re growing. Then, one day you go step on the scale. You are 15 lbs heavier than you’d like to be. Crap! You are feeling fat and ugly.

You start thinking about what you need to do to lose the excess weight that seemed to come out of nowhere. Your thoughts start to annoy you. You tell yourself you suck because you let yourself gain the extra weight. Ugh! Nothing is fitting like it used to. You’ve been wearing more black than usual.

You feel like crap and you’re noticing it’s getting in the way of your life. You don’t feel like you. And that voice in your head is getting louder: I’m feeling fat and ugly. I’m feeling fat and ugly. Ugh. It is destroying your self confidence.

And even if you’re taking actions to lose the weight, that takes time. So how can you feel good about being in a body you don’t particularly love and feel comfortable in?

You are not your body

1. Get that you are not your body. Most people have a tendency to collapse these two things.  There’s you and there is your body. YOU ARE NOT YOUR BODY.  So, your overweight body doesn’t need to get in the way of who you are and what you’d like to do.

There is something you need to think about and understand, like a rule of the universe. Like gravity. You are not your body. You need to remind yourself of this when your body is getting in the way of your life.

2. You need to respect and celebrate the body you don’t like. A lot of people refuse to buy nice new clothes until they lose the weight. Big mistake. Why wait months to look better to dress nicely and feel good?  You need to accept where you are and go out and buy some gorgeous new bigger clothes. This will help you feel great about your current body so it doesn’t get in the way of your life. It’s amazing what bigger, sexy clothes can do to make you feel good.

3. Take action!  If you’re not happy about your body, but you’re not doing anything about it then I have no pity for you, and no one else does either. Learn to be unstoppable about getting what you want. This includes the shape you want for body. And if it’s not about your weight, but you hate something else, like your nose or breasts, what are you doing about it? You don’t have to go crazy. Small, rituals lead to big results. Start walking. Eat the foods you like, but replace sugar and find natural foods to incorporate. Taking action around anything that doesn’t work in your life will immediately give you power.

And so, are you currently dealing with feeling fat and ugly? Try the tactics above and tell me what you think.

Life could be a dream if you let it

There’s a famous song from the 1950s called Sh-Boom by The Chords (and also recorded by The Crew Cuts) and it goes:

Life could be a dream, if only all my precious plans would come true

These lyrics paint a picture of how many people think about their dreams. If only they would suddenly come true. If only my dream life would drop out of the sky one day! If you’re serious about living your dream life this type of mindset won’t help you get what you want. Being intentional and taking action will.

The unfortunate truth about most people’s dreams

Most people are not living their dream life. And this is statistically true. There are many reasons for this. Most people are surrounded by people who have given up on their dreams. And many people live in an environment that doesn’t command their greatness. And they give up when the pathway to achieving what they want isn’t clear.

But, you really CAN have what you want. (Isn’t that what life’s all about anyways?) Life could be a dream if you let it. You never have to settle.

There is a”secret sauce”, a recipe for getting what you want.  It’s simple too. But it takes getting out of your own way and trusting the process.

Life could be a dream if you let it

Life could be a dream if you let it: A five step process to getting what you 

Step 1: Decide what you want. Be clear and specific on what it is and why you want it

As simple as it sounds the first step is to decide what you want. Most people think about things in life they’d like to accomplish without getting specific about it. They think about what they want when they daydream, when their mind wanders. And, they think about achieving things in “one day, some day” timeframes. They don’t get serious about it with themselves.

So, decide what it is you want. This may take exploring your options. What do you want your dream life to look like? Then, once you’ve done enough researching and considering, commit to an idea.

Committing to an idea doesn’t mean it needs to stick forever. Ideas evolve. Dreams evolve. For instance, perhaps you have a dream home you’d like to one day own in Florida. Then one day after you travel to California you decide you’d rather have your dream home be built there.

Dreams and plans can change. You’re the creator after all, but start somewhere. Decide to go after something in one area of your life today. Be specific, down to the last detail about what you want. When you are specific it helps you measure your progress.

You’ll also need to consider a measurable timeframe for when you could achieve what you want.

Step 2: Chart a course between where you are now and where you want

Once you know in specific terms what you want and how long it will likely take you to get it, it’s easy to plan the most logical actions. Start small. It’s about incremental progress. Be resourceful. What programs/people can you tap into that you already know exist and are around you? If you don’t know where to start where can you go find out (ahem, Google might be a good place to start)

Step 3: Take action

The next thing to do is take action. This is the hardest step for most people. Why? Because people are creatures of habit. We get used to ways of doing things and we have trouble breaking out of the box. Second, we let fear overcome us. Doing things differently can be scary.

How do you overcome biological tendencies for fear and your habitual nature? Become the master of them by learning how you operate. This’ll give you control over the mental barriers that take you out.

Step 4: Evaluate and recalibrate

When you start taking actions you’ll start producing results. The results you produce – good or bad – are a feedback mechanism for your progress in relation to what you want. Sometimes you take an action and learn you have to steer your ship in a completely new direction. Sometimes you validate that you’re on the right track. Pay attention to what you do. Be intentional. Be strategic and you’ll get what you want faster.

Step 5: Just keep going

Persistence! When you haven’t gotten what you want, keep going. Keep going till you get it. No matter how stupid you feel. No matter how alone you feel. Keep going! You’ll get there. Be patient and persistent.

So with that, here are the lyrics of the song called “Sh-boom” and famously known by its famous lyric as Life Could Be a Dream:

Life Could Be a Dream Lyrics – “Sh-Boom”

Life could be a dream, life could be a dream
Do, do, do, do, sh-boom

Life could be a dream (sh-boom)
If I could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom)
If you would tell me I'm the only one that you love
Life could be a dream, sweetheart
Hello, hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again

Bom ba,
Hey nonny ding dong, alang alang alanga
Oh oh oh oh dip, a dibby dobby dip

Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
If only all my precious plans would come true (sh-boom)
If you would let me spend my whole life lovin' you (sh-boom)
Life could be a dream, sweetheart (do do do do sh-boom)

Every time I look at you
Something's on my mind
If you do what I want you to
Baby, we'd be so fine!

Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
If I could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom)
And tell me darling I'm the only one that you love
Life could be a dream, sweetheart
Hello, hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again

Bom ba,
Hey nonny ding dong, alanga langala langala langala
Oh oh dip, a dibby dobby dip
Oh, life could be a dream, life could be a dream sweetheart

Do do do do sh-boom
Do do do do sh-boom
Do do do do sh-boom
Do do do do sh-boom
Za be ba da
Dip da de da dip ba di
Woah oh
Zo be ba be be ba bi
Zo be ba be be ba

Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
If I could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom)
And tell me darling I'm the only one that you love
Life could be a dream, sweetheart
Hello, hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again

Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
If I could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom)
And tell me darling I'm the only one that you love
Life could be a dream, sweetheart
Hello, hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again

Bom ba
Hey nonny ding dong, alangala langala langala langala (sh-boom)
Oh oh dip a dibby dobby dip
Life could be a dream
Life could be a dream
Do do do do sh-boom

Other versions of Sh-Boom – Life could be a dream

Here are the bands that recorded Sh-Boom (Life could be a dream):

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best questions for couple

100 questions for couples to ask each other

best questions for couplesThese 100 best questions for couples can be used when you first get to know each other, or they can be used as refresher for people who have been together for a long time. Some makes sense to ask when you first meet. A few questions are better asked when you get more serious. Some may be more appropriate for married couples.  Communication is the best tool to help develop intimacy, so ask these questions, or make up variations, or invent your own questions and then use them on each other!

Best questions for couples to ask so they can grow closer

  1. What are your best qualities?
  2. Which are your worst qualities?
  3. When did you first have your heart broken?
  4. Are you still friends with any of your ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends?
  5. Are platonic friendships possible with members of the opposite sex?
  6. How read to be monogamous? And if so why?
  7. Can you define cheating?
  8. What are your unfulfilled sexual desires or fantasies?
  9. If you won the national lottery, how would your life change?
  10. What’s your fondest memory ever memory?
  11. Describe the scariest moment of your life.
  12. What is your biggest fear?
  13. Do you have any phobias?
  14. What can instantly make you feel better if you get bad news?
  15. Which tricks do you use to fix a bad day?
  16. What is the most amazing advice you have ever received?
  17. Besides or parents, who do you respect most in your life? Why?
  18. Are you a cat person or dog person?
  19. Are good or bad at keeping secrets? Give me an example.
  20. When is it ok to tell a lie or fib?
  21. Do you bottle things up or do you ever over share?
  22. What do you wish you knew more about?
  23. If you went back to school or could study anything what would you study?
  24. Which of your body parts do you like the least?
  25. Which of your body parts do you like the most?
  26. Would you ever have cosmetic surgery?
  27. What are you most passionate about in life?
  28. Would you say you live to work, work to live, or neither?
  29. How would you respond if one of us got a job that required a lot of travel?
  30. Would you be willing to relocate for a job? For your partner’s?
  31. Would you prefer to run your own business or to work for someone else?
  32. What is the best customer service experience you ever had?
  33. What was the worst flight you ever took?
  34. Do you like to work more during the morning or in the evening?
  35. How many hours of sleep do you need to fully function at your best?
  36. What was your first pet’s name?
  37. From this list of best questions for couples, what has been your favorite so far?
  38. How often do you like to see or speak to your parents or siblings?
  39. Have you ever lost someone or something you truly loved?
  40. What’s your ideal weather or climate?
  41. Describe your ideal holiday: Sun, snow, city or beach…or other.
  42. What would or best day ever be like? Start from when I opened my eyes
  43. How do you feel about travelling with other couples?
  44. Condo or house?
  45. What drives you every day?
  46. Do you know purpose in life?
  47. What do you value more: planning or being spontaneous?
  48. Do you prefer certainty or uncertainty?
  49. Do you believe in life after death? Or reincarnation?
  50. Do you believe in a god or a higher power?
  51. Do you believe in ghosts?
  52. What religion were / are your parents? How devout were / are they?
  53. How would you react if we had a problem getting pregnant (or getting pregnant again)?
  54. Would you consider adopting children?
  55. How many children do you want, or how many more do you want?
  56. Do you want to raise your children in a particular religion or form of spirituality?
  57. Would you ever be a stay at home parent?
  58. Do you expect a partner to be a full time parent?
  59. How do you feel about hiring someone to help with childcare, cooking or housecleaning?
  60. Are birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays important to you?
  61. How do you expect to split holidays between your family and your partners?
  62. Which chores do you most like to do the most? The least?
  63. Are you a saver or a spender?
  64. How much debt do you have? Or would you like to have in a year?
  65. What was your first job?
  66. What was your worst job?
  67. Were you ever fired from a job as a kid?
  68. Who was or favorite teacher or professor?
  69. What age do you want to retire?
  70. Where do you want to be and what do you want to do when you retire?
  71. When you die: Cremation or burial?
  72. Favorite boy’s name?
  73. Favorite girl’s name?
  74. Are there any twins in your family?
  75. What names would you give twins?
  76. Are you scared of pregnancy or giving birth?
  77. What was your worst date?
  78. Have you ever been interviewed in TV or radio or for a newspaper?
  79. Who was or best boss ever?
  80. What group of kids did you  hang out with in high school?
  81. What dish would you like to learn to make?
  82. Who was your first kiss?
  83. Guns keep you safe? Gun control keeps you safe?
  84. What was the most zen moment of your life?
  85. Which behavior from others makes you angriest?
  86. What question from this best questions for couples list would to like to be asked that I haven’t asked you yet?
  87. If you wrote this list of best questions for couples, what questions would you add that is missing?
  88. What makes you most happy?
  89. What books were you into when you were a kid?
  90. Tell me about the most profound book you ever read?
  91. What is the one memory that makes you cry?
  92. What kind of parent or grandparent do you think you will be?
  93. If I died, would you remarry?
  94. What is the hardest thing you have ever done?
  95. What would be the title of your autobiography if you ever wrote one?
  96. If money was no object where would you live?
  97. What is the one thing on Amazon that you want right now that you would buy if you had a $500 gift certificate?
  98. Have you ever skydived? Would you?
  99. Would you ever edit or children’s genes? To change their looks?
  100. Elvis or the Beatles? Discuss.

Related: Free relationship tool, complete with questions for couples